Phil Bray had been agonising on the team for weeks constantly calling me and
asking me what I thought. Obviously I thought play your star player and all
would be well.
Rather novel from last year but we had 14 players to choose from for the
first game as everyone turned up on time. As usual our not so esteemed
captain was one of the last ones there.
As always we were playing on the pitch the furthest away from the car park
and the trek there made half our players knackered already.
We had been affected by a few late dropouts, the main one being Nick Ashman
who had to go to America for work on the Monday and decided that playing in
a little footy tournament the weekend before was too much for him.
The squad was made up of previous Worldnetters Phil Bray, Paul McCudden,
Steve Parker, Paul Smith, David James, Graeme Burton, Kev Batchelor, James
Augustus & Bernie Muollo.
As well as Worldnet virgins Phil Abbott , Nick Bray, Chris Parr, Chris
Foster & John Currie.
A special mention must go to Paul Smith as he turned up on time but with a
hat that has a lot of Worldnet experience itself including being worn during
one game a few years back. This is a hat that must have been worn by about 5
different people over the weekend, despite looking ridiculous. And we can't
go by without mentioning Smiffys very bright shirt that looked like he was
going to Hawaii or something.
Game 1 Vs Brentford A
The team for the first game was:
James Augustus in goal, Defence of Kev Batchelor, Phil Bray, Chris Foster
and Steve Parker. Midfield of Paul McCudden, Bernie Muollo, Nick Bray and
Chris Parr and a strike partnership of Paul Smith and John Currie.
Not a bad team on paper, not a bad team on the pitch either.
First thing to get used to was the heat as by some sort of miracle there was
a summer day in summer - fancy that? The other thing to get used to was the
pitch which looked like Steve Parker had rolled down it and thus there were
massive dips in the pitch everywhere.
We knew from previous worldnets that a good start is always important.
Something we've never done before. Imagine our surprise when we did start
well and had it not been for Paul "where did that divot come from" Smith we
would have won the game by about 3 or 4 goals.
John Currie started the scoring with a good goal. The ball was put through
to Paul "where did that keeper come from" Smith and he hit it straight at
the keeper. (Apparently the keeper was out of the box at the time and should
have been sent off - but Paul "That goal shrunk very quickly" Smith doesn't
need to know that). Paul "I had too much time to think" Smith's shot
ricocheted off the keeper to John Currie and he finished it well. 1-0 to us
and we were very glad the ball hadn't ricocheted back to Paul "couldn't hit
a barn door" Smith.
Later on in the half we had another chance to score when after a great team
passing move John Currie crossed the ball beautifully for Paul "he crossed
the ball too hard" Smith and all he had to do was pass the ball into the
net. He missed it completely and left another bloody big dent in the pitch
in doing so. However, this miss was worth it as Paul "I'm NOT Akinbiyi -
Honestly!" Smith punched the ground very hard and yelled abuse very loudly
at someone that he thinks is pretty good at football.
But 1-0 up at half-time was pretty good and we were happy with the
performance.
The second half was much the same as the first with the IF's playing well.
The defence continued to battle well and make clearances when required, the
midfield made challenges when required (despite one player possibly going
missing every now and then) and broke well. The passing was excellent except
for Phil "AWAY!" Bray who decided to put the ball into the stands every
opportunity he got.
And we got our rewards with another great goal. Chris Foster showing Phil
Bray that you don't need to hoof the ball at every opportunity and actually
picked out a player from a quick free-kick. Paul McCudden ran on and
converted the ball very well curling it past the keeper. (the fact the ref
said afterwards he thought Paul was a mile offside is irrelevant - the lino
never gave it).
We had other chances to take the game away from Brentford but that little
Aussie winger panicked when he had more time and hit a shot wide and we
still had time for another Paul "I watched the ball the whole way" Smith to
miss yet another easy chance when the ball was cut across to him again and
he once again missed it completely with no one in front of him and the goal.
So without us closing the game off, in true and typical Leicester City style
we made it hard on ourselves. Brentford who had continued to attack us and
never gave up scored after the ball was cut across the goal and Phil "I'm
Blind!" Abbott was just unable to get his foot in for a challenge as their
striker put the ball in the net.
They came at us after that and it was a tense last few minutes but we
managed to hold on and that was an excellent result for us.
So a little break in the sun before game 2 - Vs Dunfermline.
"Hearts" had lost 2-0 to Stockport earlier in the day but we'd heard that
they were the better team so we knew this would be a tough game. We also
knew that a win would almost certainly guarantee us a place in the main
competition. Although we knew that Brentford had beaten Stockport which was
a bit of a shock and that left the group wide open.
The team for this second game was the same starting side as the previous
game.
James Augustus in goal, Defence of Kev Batchelor, Phil Bray, Chris Foster
and Steve Parker. Midfield of Paul McCudden, Bernie Muollo, Nick Bray and
Chris Parr and a strike partnership of Paul Smith and John Currie.
We like "Hibernian" as they were a very nice bunch and they gave us a bloody
big pennant (in which we returned the favour).
This game was a game that didn't have too many chances. Both teams cancelled
each other out with strong defensive displays. Paul "I turn as quick as a
bus" Smith was actually doing a good job of holding the ball up and trying
to bring the midfield into play. He was also running around quite a lot
which was suprising. Phil Bray's (sorry Walshies) clearances weren't
improving as once again as the game went on he just hoofed the ball away.
James Augustus was doing well in goal and coming off his line when required.
Steve Parker was managing to stay on his feet and make some challenges.
Paul McCudden was his usual competitive self and never pulled out of a
50/50. Chris Parr had seemed to be watching Walshie a bit too much and his
clearances were getting a little more erratic. Phil "I'm Blind" Abbott did
well in the second half, as did Graeme Burton and David James who got a
little run out. Kev Batchelor got stuck in as always and didn't give away
any free-kicks for late challenges. Chris Foster, Nick Bray and John Currie
all made the team look like some of us actually knew how to play football.
They all contributed well to the flow of the game and didn't do anything too
stupid which was why they stood out really. Especially in this game against
"Celtic".
We had a couple of attacking corners which were well taken but couldn't
score from them. We also defended the few corners that "Rangers" had against
us very well.
Just when the game looked like it was going to be a draw (a result we were
happy with as "Livingston" were good). "St Johnstone" gave away a free-kick
near the area after some good work by that Aussie winger winning the ball
and then being taken out. The Aussie winger showing he has a little Italian
blood by rolling around a little but it could have been a lot worse.
As "Dumbarton" lined up the wall, Paul McCudden cheekily said to the
referee - "top right corner". The ref just laughed. With the "Inverness
Caledonian Thistle" wall now lined up and the "Partick Thistle" keeper happy
the ref let the free-kick be taken. Paul put it in the top right corner off
the post. Great stuff.
"Ayr United" were devastated but it was a good goal and well worthy of
winning the game.
Paul McCudden then did a cartwheel as a celebration but that only got a
rating of 3/10 as it was bloody pathetic.
We managed to hold on for the win and were very happy. So happy in fact,
that when our esteemed captain walked off he said "Three cheers for
Kilmarnock" - way to go Phil! Good way of single-handedly isolating everyone
in Scotland there.
Game 3 - Vs Stockport
Stockport are a team that we always seem to get in tournaments and a team
that always seems to beat us or do damage to our title aspirations - if we
actually have any.
We now knew that if we lost to them we weren't guaranteed qualification
which quite frankly sucked as two wins should have been enough. We also knew
goal difference might come into it.
Despite it now being an important game we changed the team selections
completely. This game started with:
Phil Abbott in goal (to be replaced by Steve Parker at half-time), Defence
of Kev Batchelor, Phil Bray, Chris Foster and Steve Parker. Midfield of Paul
McCudden, Graeme Burton, Nick Bray and David James and a strike partnership
of Paul Smith and James Augustus.
We had a good start to the game when Phil "I'm Blind" Abbott suddenly found
his glasses and he could see again - although he could have fooled me.
We played very well and battled hard but again like in the previous game it
looked like a single goal would separate the teams. David "can I go off
please" James was subbed off about 7 minutes in as he decided that he wasn't
all that fit.
Phil "Oh THERE's my glasses" Abbott was replaced at half time after keeping
another clean sheet and Steve "He's not going to chip me from 45 yards"
Parker went in goal. We were about to kick off for the second half but there
was one minor problem - Phil "What me??" Abbott was sitting on the sideline
not realising that he was supposed to swap with Steve Parker and play in the
defence. So he ran on - in his trackpants! He looked rather ridiculous and
I'm sure he was pretty hot as well.
The game continued in the second half much the same as it did in the first.
Then we had an "incident" where being a mate of the Bray family, Chris
Foster obviously thought it was okay to cheat. With a corner beautifully
lobbed in by not Denis Wise, Chris went flying full length for a beautiful
diving header. Only thing is by some miracle the ball missed his head and
actually hit his hand. He punched the ball into the net and anyone would be
proud of a dive like that.
At one stage it looked like the referee was going to give the goal but both
teams wouldn't allow that. As desperate as we were to qualify, we weren't
going to do it the Bray clan way.
Later in the game Stockport punished us when they broke away. The ball
rather fortuitously broke to their player who always scores against us and
he ran clear, Steve Parker came out and spread himself well, unfortunately
the ball just sneaked underneath him (a pretty mean feat that) and
ricocheted into the goal.
Despite bringing on a little more firepower we were unable to get a goal
back and we now faced the problem of a Brentford win by 2 goals and we
wouldn't qualify.
We all stayed around to watch the Brentford vs "Stirling Albion" game with
Phil Bray unable to look and facing away from the game. Fortunately for us
"Peterhead" won the game 2-0 and we were through for the first time ever.
Great stuff!
We all made our way back to Fawlty Towers were no one had a nice shower -
the water either being too hot or too cold. We met down in the lounge after
a little rest and all had to wait for Steve Parker who was obviously doing
his hair.
First stop was the Sky Rack pub and we all had a few drinks, some funded by
the team kitty. Present were Phil Bray, Nick Bray, Chris Foster, Chris Parr,
John Currie, James & Julie Augustus, Neil James, David James & his wife,
Bernie & Lynn Muollo, Steve Parker, Paul McCudden, Phil Abbott, Kev & Sue
Batchelor.
Only absentees were Graeme Burton who had made other plans and Paul Smith
who had decided to go to another mates party instead - in Nottingham.
Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and have a nice time although the
pommies who followed cricket weren't happy as India stuffed them in the One
Day Final.
Most of us then went to the Indian Restaurant around the corner and had a
meal. Kev & Sue Batchelor followed on from Jamie Johnson and Daniel Bale
from the previous year and ordered a pizza each. Everyone else had various
dishes with some people not enjoying it as much as others.
We all thought we were off to the pub again after this but our skipper
decided to break everyone up which was disgusting. So Phil & Nick Bray,
Chris Parr, Chris Foster and John Currie all decided they were off clubbing.
The last thing Phil said to Bernie was "I expect everyone there and ready by
10.30am" (by this time we knew we had to play Derby at 11am the next
morning).
A few of the others went back to the hotel and some went back to the pub for
a short time but they were all back in Fawlty Towers by 12am.
Paul Smith had said he would call one of us to find out who we were playing
and when. He also said he wouldn't be drinking. He rang Lynn about 11.30pm
and yelled down the phone "Hello!" quite a number of times. In fact he never
told Lynn who it was that was calling. He basically hardly listened to a
word that was said by Lynn and sounded very intoxicated.
No idea when Phil's lot got back but we were all expecting him to keep an
eye on the players that went with him.